Leia: Never be afraid of who you are, Rey.
Rey: I’ll never be afraid of who I am.
At first I was no one,
With a staff and a gun,
But now I’m at Skywalker Farm instead!
Poe: Never be afraid of who you are, Rey.
I am not afraid of who I am.
Everyone knows I’m nice.
I never sold the spice–
That sort of substance there can ruin lives!
Finn: Never be afraid of who you are, Poe.
Poe: Well, I do not remember asking, Finn.
Finn: “Come and get your spice!
It won’t mess up your life.”
As a pilot, you’re still flying high!
Never be afraid of who you are, Rey.
Rey: I’ll never be afraid of who I am.
Finn: I’m here to yell your name,
And much to my own shame,
I’m comic relief-slash-runaway slave!
Luke: Never be afraid of who you are, Rey.
Rey: I’ll never be afraid of who I am.
Luke: I tried to murder Ben.
Rey: Oh, no, not this again.
Ben: But in the Force, he and I are now friends.
Never be afraid of who you are, Rey.
The dark side doesn’t define who I am.
I am Grandfather’s son–
Han: That is not what I want.
Ben: I thought I killed you.
How are you not dead?
Han: Never be afraid of who you are, Rey.
Rey: I’ll never be afraid of who I–Han?
Han: Don’t ruin the fun.
I was named by someone
While I was waiting in line as a kid!
Luke: I feel like my words need an explanation.
Also, the Jedi don’t need to end.
It was an accident–
The button hit my hand
Lightsabers sometimes just go really bad!
Ben: I feel like I just disagree quite strongly.
That is why your temple’s torn to shreds.
That’s why I killed my past.
The Jedi will not last.
Rey: I am not so sure that is a fact.
Never be afraid of who you are, Ben.
You’re so important to who I am.
If you would take my hand,
Then maybe there’s a chance
For at least like five seconds of romance!
Leia: Never be afraid of who you are, Ben.
Ben: Please, just stop it–you don’t understand.
Leia: I will locate your light
And even win this fight
As far as I’m concerned I’m still alive.
I even found you a pleasant girlfriend.
We give each other a lot of hugs.
Ben: Don’t make this about love–
We had only one hug.
Poe: Alright! I admit that I sold some drugs!
Rey: I feel like that last part was quite random.
I imagine it was quickly writ.
Why bother understanding
This unwashed, angry fandom?
All they say now is Star Wars is–
Luke: Quit!
Please remember it’s a sacred island–
Language like that’s simply not allowed.
I think we’ve established
The falling of the Sith–
And that is what Star Wars is all about!
Never be afraid of who you are, Rey.
Rey: I am not afraid of who I am.
I am a Palpatine,
But Skywalker, it seems–
An Empress, and a Jedi, and a Queen!
…
And no one,
Or maybe…just a junk girl.
Lonely, and unloved, and without friends.
Ben: But that is all the past.
You’re here with us at last.
You’ve given us the hope that we now have.
Rey: We are not afraid of who we are, Ben.
Ben: You helped me to see just who I am.
Rey: And you helped me, as well.
Ben: Yes, even when I fell.
Rey: But you rose up again
And all is swell.
Ben: Yes, we rose up again–
Rey: And all–
Ben: Is–
Rey: Swell.
Rose: [enters dramatically]
Never be afraid of who you a–
[Everyone pauses to look at Rose.]
Rose: J.J.!!!
Commentary:
I thought I’d go for something a bit light-hearted, and this idea for a Star Wars musical number popped into my head in the shower yesterday. I just went with it for as long as I could. Hopefully it’s not taken too seriously, as it’s all meant in good fun. I wanted to do something that honored the story of Episode IX and also took enough playful jabs at its faults, as well. I like all the movies, and I definitely don’t hate The Rise of Skywalker or anything. I’ve watched it five times and will hopefully get to watch it five hundred times more, because it’s Star Wars. Well, hopefully it was fun for someone. Until next time.