Manchild (A Song)

Caught between
Two extremes
Every scene
A nightmarish dream
You win again
My wicked enemy
I can’t pretend
That you don’t get to me


Not quite a man
Not quite a child
Lived in the past
But dying now
Not quite a plan
Cry for awhile
Do what I can
No matter how
Much it hurts


Within the tears
You have to see
The hates and fears
And insanity
A lonely war
Me against my opposite
I’m wanting more
But these shoes simply don’t fit


Not quite a man
Not quite a child
Lived in the past
But dying now
Not quite a plan
Cry for awhile
Do what I can
No matter how
Much it hurts


Echoes of hurting
Rage gives me power
I know I’m learning
From pain every hour
Vengeance, teach me
How can I use you?
Repentance, reach me
How can I choose you?


Not quite a man
Not quite a child
Lived in the past
But dying now
Not quite a plan
Cry for awhile
Do what I can
No matter how
Much it hurts


Commentary:

This song is inspired by a character in a story idea I worked on years ago.  It was a villain named Amanda Childress (aka ‘Manchild’), whose hatred of men led her to create the Women’s Liberation Army with the goal of eradicating the male race.  It’s a long story–I only got as far as ‘abusive father obliterated her teddy bear with a shotgun while she watched, and she eventually ran away from home’.  Still not sure how the hero was going to stop her, actually.  Ah, well.  Never did finish writing it anyway.  But I wanted to not just write the story, but really think of it as a movie and have a song inspired by the character. The idea was that the song would fit with a musical theme that would be in the film score.  Of course, it also works on other levels that I think it’s easy to relate to.  So there it is.  Until next time.

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